I have two presentations one Monday of next week, and I'm terrified! It can be a pain in the butt to care what other people think when the time rolls around for you to stand up and give your point of view.
Anyone have any tips to make this a LESS painful experience?
jadehorse77
Calm yourself as best as possible beforehand. Oftentimes, people sweat under their arms when they are nervous about public speaking, so if that happens to you, just wear a shirt that won't make it too obvious that you're sweating...i.e. a black shirt.
Practice the talk beforehand. As in, stand up in your room and say the words you're going to say. Even with no one listening, it helps to say the words and practice several times, so that when you have to perform, your tongue knows what to say, even if you are nervous.
Finally, when you give the talk, stand with both shoulders facing the room. Look around the room as you talk. If you are comfortable with making eye contact, then do it, it makes the listener pay attention. If you're not comfortable, then just look at the space directly over their heads.
I'm an old hand at public speaking after having been in acting, band, and having taught for the past four years. I've also had to give presentations every semester to my professors and my doctoral committee. Trust me, do it more, practice it more, and you'll be fine.
Lyssandra
That's a tip no one has ever given me, about wearing the black shirt.
I'll be sure to use all of it, thanks!
jadehorse77
Well, even with all of my experience, I still sweat profusely when I'm teaching, I'm not even nervous anymore. But there's just something that makes your body react. So a dark shirt that will hide the sweat is just a good idea. Even if you don't sweat, it's better safe than sorry...or embarrassed.
jadehorse77
Well, how'd it go?
VRaptorX
oh yeah...I completly forgot about this. How did it go?
Lyssandra
Everyone said I did fairly well, so all I have to do is sit and wait for the NEXT nerve-wracking speech.
jadehorse77
Well, I have to give a talk tomorrow on a newly discovered abscisic acid receptor. Yippee!!!!
Lyssandra
YAY! I don't know what you just said!!!
Have fun with that. Perhaps I should become a TA and stand in front of a class a good deal of time like you to try and get my bearings in public speaking.
Unfortunately, it helps if you WANT to speak to people, a desire I don't necessarily have. I'm a misanthropist, and I don't like people on a good day; my dislike for them grows a good deal when I have to stand in front of a group of fellow undergraduates that really couldn't care less about what I have to say....
jadehorse77
Well, the talk was kind of fun because no one in the plant group has any experience with plant hormones related to signaling flower development. In a nutshell, it was a bunch of profs and grad students looking at me, I said what I knew, and then they asked questions to the room in general and none of us had any good answers. At least it was way laid back and my grade is pass/fail, not how good did I present or not.
When you speak in front of people....how do I say this...it helps to have a little arrogance. A little, "I'm good and I know it." That's not a good attitude to have in everyday life, but if you can cultivate it enough to "turn it on" when you need it...it helps immensely. If you go up there with the attitude of "you people want to hear what I have to say because what I have to say is GOOD"....then it magically works and they pay attention to you.
Lyssandra
jade.... you should know by now I have not an arrogant bone in my body. If someone says something, I agree just to avoid conflict, and I don't press my point much; I'm not assertive with what I believe, and most of the time I think I'm wrong just because someone else presents another point of view. Little late to be cultivating arrogance.
VRaptorX
we Lys....it's OK. Don't be afraid of someone yelling at you or anything. Just look at me as an example.
*hears crickets chirp*
or not.
Lyssandra
Lol, I look at myself as an example too, which is why this is so difficult.
jadehorse77
Well, it takes time. You do have to cultivate that, because to people like us it doesn't come naturally. And yes, I did say "us" because I was the same way. I used to be WAY shy and submissive and I would never say anything to build myself up. But a very very wise woman (my Mom) taught me to grab life by the horns (so to speak) and not let anyone tell me I can't do something. She encouraged me to be the drum major of my high school marching band. I never would have even thought about trying out for it, but she said..."If you can't do it, who can? You're just as good as anyone else out there." So I did it, with much reservation, and lo and behold I got the position.
Suddenly I had to stand up in front of 200 of my peers and make them play in unison by watching me conduct. It was SCARY, but it started to be lots of fun when I noticed that a lot of the younger ones were really looking up to me. I'd see freshman in little groups imitating my conducting style, asking me questions about it, asking if I liked doing it. I realized something....I was good at this! It really helped me immensely in life. I probably never would have thought that I could go for a Ph.D if it weren't for my Mom and my experiences telling me I could.
It's okay to be a little arrogant if you need to be. That's why I put it in terms of "turn it on" and "turn it off". No one likes someone who's arrogant all the time. But someone who has just the right touch of arrogance is someone whom everyone else looks up to and admires.
I know it's tough to do, especially this "late" in life. But it might be worth a try. It's all about internal dialogue. Tell yourself that you are good at this, you deserve this, you are a worthy person. The energy that you project does reflect on how people see you.
Lyssandra
But I don't know how to play drums.
I'm also NOT good at public speaking, and I don't like it at all. Before you say anything, no, I am not just throwing myself a pity party. I'm realistic about my abilities; I can write, read, work out problems, and do anything that has absolutely nothing to do with other people like no one else I know, but public speaking is not my thing.
jadehorse77
And that is totally okay.
And "Drum Major" has nothing to do with drums. It's the person who stands on the podium and conducts the marching band. I didn't know how to do it when I tried out...nobody did. We just tried out as best we could, and the director picked the person with the potential. Then he brought in his friend who was a conducting genius to spend three whole days with me teaching me everything he knew.
You may not be good at something, but you can learn to be. I'm not saying you have to become the most eloquent speaker in the world. But it sounds like you want to improve....and I'm saying you CAN goshdarnit!
Lyssandra
It takes a little bit of charisma, which I have none of. People don't listen to me, and even when they do, it's a stretch. No amount of practice will help a person with no natural ability or skill. Practice is for people who have a little talent. People who don't... well, they never have the predisposition toward it, so it takes a hell of a lot more work.
VRaptorX
There is no such thing as "talent." Just project your voice and there will be more people listening.
Lyssandra
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
Yeah, you can tell you've never met me. Project my voice? I'd sooner be able to play the violin without having ever picked it up before.
